Once a year, a day pops up on the calendar when some people don’t have to go to work, some businesses close, and advertisements of “blow-out” sales flood every form of media, all in recognition of Labor. Well technically, the day is in recognition of the labor movement, which led to great progress in workers’ rights, workplace safety, and much more.
Make sure to check out the links at the end of this article if you want to learn about the history of Labor Day. What we’re actually talking about here is The Days After Labor. When was the last time you intentionally paused to reflect on your labor without judgement? I’m not just referring to sweat producing manual labor either. Let’s consider labor as any physical or mental energy that we expend to produce or in pursuit of something.
For myself, I would bet that the amount of mental energy I expend is almost always greater than the physical. This isn’t because I’m lazy either (well, maybe sometimes). It’s not uncommon for me to ruminate on what went wrong, what could have been done, should have done, and every other form of judgement that can be placed on something. I’m not alone in this and, from my own experience, this kind of rumination typically leads to wasted energy and is a net loss when combined with any potential benefit we may think it brings.
Reflection or Rumination
I definitely think reflecting on our work can be beneficial. However, I see a big difference between intentional nonjudgmental reflection and spiraling down a path of judgement filled rumination. So, how do we tell the difference? One simple (if we remember to ask it and are honest with ourselves) question:
“Is this beneficial?”
I have heard variations of this prompt from many people whom I greatly respect and on several of my favorite podcasts. Each time I hear it mentioned, there is inevitably a moment of, “Duh Justin! Why haven’t you been utilizing this lately?!?” Then, without pause, a smile crosses my face and say to myself, “Justin, is this beneficial?”
When I remember to ask this simple question amidst an internal dance of thoughts that are rehashing the past, I often realize, “This is not beneficial.” However, our internal dialogue is rarely as cut and dry as good vs bad. There are often elements of our thoughts or mindset that are beneficial and elements that are not.
Internal Dialogue
Healthy reflection of the past also means being present in the “here and now” as we consider what has already occurred. When my internal dialogue is saying things like…
“After they said no, I could have said, ‘Well I wasn’t reeeaally asking and you likely wouldn’t have been worthy anyways!’ Then they look up at me with a glare of defeat and say ‘Justin, you are so right. I’m not worthy.’ As they turn and slowly walk away, the sun breaks through the clouds, shinning directly on me, and a flash mob breaks into a carefully choreographed mash up of victorious songs!”
…yeah, this would be an example of not being in the here and now, and perhaps some other unsavory flare. No matter how dramatic or logical our rehashing of the past may seem, it is only in the present moment that we can consider it in a healthy manner. When we notice that we have mentally time traveled back to an event, this is a great opportunity to pause and ask ourselves those three simple words,
“Is this beneficial?”
As I pause to briefly break down my internal dialogue from the example above, I identify three different elements: 1) The “flare” that provides a bit of color, 2) A feeling of rejection, and 3) The unpleasant nature of this feeling. I can now apply our question to each of the elements independently and I determine that considering two of those elements is beneficial. This doesn’t mean I need to ruminate on them though. I can simply make a mental note of “feeling of rejection…unpleasant”, take a deep breath, and move about my day.
There may be times where we want to consider things a bit more and there is nothing inherently wrong or harmful with that. When we notice that we’re considering things for an extended period of time or starting to judge what we’re considering, this is another fantastic opportunity to ask ourselves…(Yes, you guessed correctly!), “Is this beneficial?”
Group Rumination
Sometimes our dialogue is not internal, but rather part of a group session. We may be discussing with colleagues a past project that didn’t go so well. This could even be part of an “After-action Review” or “Post-mortem Meeting” taking place at the conclusion of a project. Noting what worked and what didn’t as well as the parts of the project that occurred as expected and the unforeseen events is a valuable part of assessing any project.
There can be a point in this process where the group shifts from factual reflection of what took place (noting what occurred without judgement), into unbeneficial group rumination. This is especially common in groups where there is a great amount of passion around the project. Keeping in mind principles of active communication, we can also introduce those three words into the conversation,
“Is this beneficial?”
Just as asking ourselves this question can lead to a flurry of internal rebuttals, be prepared for the same in a group setting. Highlighting the elements of the discussion that you do find beneficial can be a great way to help steer the conversation in a more productive direction.
After the After-Action
The line between beneficial reflection and unbeneficial rumination is not always so clear. Something you can try, after the “After-action”, is an internal “After the After-action”. Whether it be a group project or self-reflection exercise, take a moment to reflect on the review itself. Make a note of what worked and what didn’t, separate from the actual project deliverables or the details of what you were reflecting on.
No matter if you are freestyling or using any of the many techniques, exercises, or methodologies associated with self and group reflection, don’t forget to pause every now and again to ask,
“Is this beneficial?”
Links to things I find interesting:
History of Labor Day – US Department of Labor
Self Reflection Meditation – Mindworks
Reflective Practices – University of Minnesota
Work-Related Rumination – FrontiersIn.org
Mindfulness at Work – Positive Psychology
Why You Should Make Time for Self-Reflection (Even If You Hate Doing It) – Harvard Business Review
